The Florez Family Love Story

We wanted to post a quick update to let everybody know that Baby Joseph made his grand entrance into the world on April 6th, weighing in at 6lb 12oz and 20 inches long!!! Due to the circumstances brought on by the pandemic we were FINALLY able to meet him and bring him home with us today (April 9th) a little after noon. Everyone is doing great, he is so calm and easy going it’s hard to believe it’s real. We will post more details on the whirlwind that lead up to today in the near future (it’s been quite a journey), but for now we are going to enjoy our little man!  Thank you all for your continued prayers and well wishes, they continue to mean the world to us!!!

God Bless,

D, K, & J

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.

    Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you.

    I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

                                         -Isaiah 41:10

Never in a million years would anyone have imagined that we would be nearing the end of our adoption journey in the midst of a global pandemic – and yet here we are!  With the madness of the past couple weeks we just wanted to post an update to say that all is still well and moving forward with the adoption! This past weekend marked 36 weeks, and everyone continues to stay healthy! We’ve been doing a lot of thinking, praying, planning, praying, and rethinking about how to best go about getting out to meet our son amidst the health crisis the country is currently facing, and ultimately we have decided that the best course of action is to go ahead and drive there and back. We’re choosing not to live in fear, but also need to be prudent. Although we are both in good health and are not really worried about COVID19 on a personal level, the reality is that the most vulnerable to severe complications are the very old and the very young. It’s just not worth the risk of introducing anything to our little guy, or not being able to meet him because one of us caught something in the airport/on a plane. We’re working on nailing down the logistics of making the trip which will be around 28 hrs and a little over 1800 miles each way. Neither of us are crazy about extended road trips, but our motivation for this one is high! We still need a couple of pieces to fall into place to be able to solidify the plan, so please continue to keep us in prayer. We know God has the details of it all already figured out, and are doing our best to wait patiently as they roll out one by one. 

God Bless,

D & K

Everywhere we go these days the first thing people want to know is if there are any updates, so we wanted to post and share with as many people as possible. The reality is there probably won’t be a whole lot to report until he is actually here, but again we want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has been keeping us in thoughts and prayer – it’s definitely working! It’s hard to believe, but Baby Boy hit 34 weeks this past weekend!!  Considering where we were 6 weeks ago, this is incredible news! By all accounts mom and baby are doing great, but please continue to partner with us in prayer for a safe and healthy duration of the pregnancy/delivery.  We are also praying for peace, comfort, wisdom, and clarity of thought for the expectant family as the due date and everything that comes along with it approaches.

As things get more “real” we’ve been in contact with the other agency we will be working with. Unfortunately adoption isn’t any cheaper in their state. We’ll be needing to come up with roughly $9,000 more in agency fees than we were expecting, thus the bump in our target bar. One way or another it will all work out – God continues to show up as we continue to receive donations from all different avenues. Trusting Him and hanging on tight while riding the roller coaster that is adoption! 

God bless,

Daniel & Kristin

Hey Everyone!

We have some big news to share…

We are officially MATCHED with an expectant mother and baby boy on the East Coast!!! Words can’t describe how excited and blessed we are by this news! Our journey to be parents has spanned the past 7.5 years, and to see God’s hand at work in the current situation is truly incredible.  Baby boy is due in April; however, there are some complications that we need prayer for. Out of respect for everyone’s privacy we don’t want to give too many specifics, but the nature of what is going on increases the risk for premature birth and a potentially lengthy stay in the NICU once he is delivered (depending on how early he comes).  As such, we are basically on “stand by” to hop a plane out to where they are at any moment in the event they need to deliver quickly. Unfortunately it is not something that can be planned, so we are making as many preparations as we can at this point. God is good and we are standing in faith that He has the situation figured out, even though many aspects are out of anyone’s control. Our prayers are that she is able to stay pregnant as long as possible, for a safe and healthy delivery (for momma and baby), and for favor in the logistics of traveling out of state and needing to stay there for several weeks while medical and legal issues are resolved. 

As excited as we are for this incredible blessing, the realities of our world dictate that our financial needs have also drastically changed.  Our original budgeting for this endeavor did not include the complexities of an out-of-state adoption or potential medical needs, such as:

-Emergency airfare to get there (current prices are between $500-$600 each, one way)

-Lodging, food, and transportation while there (realistically anywhere from 4-10 weeks)

-Short notice airfare to return home (we anticipate similar rates to get home as to get there.  We will not have much notice of when we have permission to cross state lines with our son as we will be at the mercy of the government agencies in both states to process the proper paperwork). 

Compounding all of this is the reality that a majority of our paid leave was used during our last round of IVF, so a large majority of the time we will be able to take under FMLA will be docked from our income on a per diem basis.  We are running through every scenario and contingency we can think of, but the logistics of not being able to plan for any of these factors are proving to be quite daunting. Again, we are fully trusting that God will provide for our family some way some how!  We are so thankful to everyone who has contributed to this cause thus far. It is very humbling to realize the enormity of financial resources needed in the world of adoption, and how quickly they can multiply. We truly appreciate every prayer that has been and will continue to be offered on our behalf, and we appreciate any consideration for additional contributions now more than ever.  

God Bless,

The Florez Fam    

Update #1:

On June 4th we got some really great news – after 2 ½ months of background checks, prayer, paperwork, meetings, prayer, fees, interviews, questionnaires, and more prayer our homestudy was officially approved!!! This is a huge step in moving forward as it is pretty much the biggest requirement in the adoption process. The two most common questions we’ve gotten as we have shared this news are “What happens now?“ and “Do you know how long you will have to wait?”  

What happens now: We will be providing several copies of a profile book we have been working on throughout our homestudy.  It is basically a picture book that is used to show different aspects of our lives to expectant parents. Each family that is “active” with the agency (homestudy approved and in the waiting pool) has a book profiling their family as well, and when a woman decides to make an adoption plan and place their child for adoption they are given a stack of books to look at and decide which family they want to meet. Once you are selected the caseworker coordinates a “match meeting” where we will meet with the expectant parent and the caseworker.  Hope’s Promise believes there is power in breaking bread together, so these match meetings take place over a meal. At that point both parties (the prospective adoptive family and the expectant parent) decide individually if they think it is a good fit. If it is then you move forward together all the way through the birth of the child. If not then the process starts over for both parties. The agency encourages the expectant parents to select 2 or 3 families to ensure they are able to find one they are comfortable with.

How long will we have to wait:  The reality is that there is absolutely no way to know.  There have been families that have only waited 1-2 weeks, and there are families who have to wait 2-3 years.  It all depends on how long it takes for you to be chosen by an expectant parent. We get a lot of questions about this aspect of the adoption, but underlying our decision to embark on this adventure is our faith that God is in control of our family’s destiny.  We are standing in belief that however long it takes is the amount of time necessary for the child God has in store for us to join us. We find peace in knowing that He is never early and He is never late, and our family will only grow exactly when and how it is supposed to!

Update #2:

As Kristin alluded to earlier this month the nursery room is complete! We’ve been working hard on getting everything ready and wanted to have it done so we could include it in our profile book. Kristin has done an amazing job planning every little detail, and we are excited to have a space in our home waiting to be filled!  Check out the attached pictures!

This will be the last of our retroactive updates, but we thought it was an important part of the journey, so we wanted to share.  As we mentioned in our last update, we had been doing a lot of praying and exploration to determine if we were going to be pursuing foster-to-adopt or traditional adoption.  The first two foster agencies we talked to were pretty blunt about the fact that foster care’s primary focus is reunification – which we knew – but they made it clear that adoptions were far and few between.  We had heard that many agencies will discourage adoption because foster families are hard to come by and they invest a lot of resources into training and licensing each family, which is understandable. I guess it was just different to hear it/see it in practice.  Some were more willing than others to discuss what it would look like should we be in a position to adopt. The third agency we met with seemed much more willing to work with us based on our ultimate goal of adoption and gave us a lot more information about the different tracts foster children are placed on – or as they call them, permanency goals.  We had actually made up our minds to move forward with this agency, but had already set up a meeting with Hope’s Promise, and we wanted to be thorough in our exploration before making a final decision. I actually said to Kristin as we were driving to that meeting “they are going to have to have something pretty compelling to change my mind.” As it turns out, they did.  We decided that going this route was much more in line with our current goals, despite the cost, and completely shifted gears to traditional infant adoption.

Fast forward about a week and a half.  We were getting ready for bed and Kristin got a Facebook message from some friends in Albuquerque – who we don’t really talk to very much – asking if they could call us.  We got on the phone with them and they shared that we had been on their hearts, and although they didn’t really know where we were in the journey to become parents, they were made aware of a baby that had been born the night before who was going to be placed up for adoption.  They wanted to know if we were interested. It was hard to believe what we were hearing, but we emphatically told them YES!

The next 3 days are best described as a whirlwind.  We didn’t have a clue what the adoption process looked like, other than some details that were shared in our first meeting with Hope’s Promise – but it was pretty limited.  Add to that the complication of it being an interstate adoption, we had a LOT to learn and not a lot of time to do it. We quickly learned that Colorado is an “agency state” meaning that the only way to legally adopt a child is to work through an accredited adoption agency.  Things are a little different in New Mexico, so we were on the verge of retaining a lawyer down there to help facilitate. In the meantime we still hadn’t even applied to an agency, so I was on the phone a lot the next day figuring out everything that needed to be done on our end.  Hope’s Promise was incredibly helpful through the process and worked with us to get our application submitted and approved by the next day. Long story short, we found out about a week later that birth mom decided to keep the baby. Although this was disappointing to a certain extent, our prayer the entire time was not that we would end up with him, but that he would end up where God meant for him to be.  The last thing we would want, regardless of how our adoption takes place, is for the birth parents to make a decision that they later regret and have to live with for the rest of their lives. In the end, the worst case scenario was that we were already accepted and working with the agency we planned to work with anyway – so even the worst case scenario was still a positive outcome. In retrospect it was a blessing of sorts, because there is no telling how long we would have waited to submit our application, second guessed our decision, etc, etc.  We had been praying for guidance and for God to put people in our path that would lead us to the route and agency we were meant to work with, and we are trusting that our prayers have been answered.

You hear a lot of people talk about how stressful the process is, and though I wouldn’t say it has been a walk in the park, by and large our experience has been very positive.  Our current case worker is extremely helpful and accommodating, and we are taking it all one step at a time. We are very close to getting all of the paperwork/medical exams/financial records/etc completed for our home study, and once this is done we will start interviews with a case worker and will also have a home inspection completed.  After our home study is approved we will pay the first big installment of our fee schedule, and at that time will become “active”. This means that we will be in the pool of other potential adoptive families for this agency and could be selected at any time. We will have created a profile book that is meant to give birth parents as an insight into our lives, including who we are, our home, and our families.  These books are shown to birth parents, and they decide who they would like to meet and/or get more information about. We are getting close, and as that reality sets in we are also getting excited. There will likely be a period of waiting – months, if not years – but we are working our way down the right path, and our hearts grow more prepared to receive each step of the way.

(On a side note, you may have noticed our progress bar recently made a significant leap forward, to the tune of $5,000. This is because it is also designed to reflect our own contribution to the adoption.  It is now more accurately showing what we’ve already paid out and what we’ve been able to put aside over the past couple months. We will continue to update as we are able to raise funds and set more aside. Our first payment will be a little over $10,000, so we are closing in, but still have some work to do! The good news is that once our home study is approved we can start applying for various grants, which we are believing will help with the next fee of $12,000 which will be due upon placement.)

Thanks for tuning in!

Love,

Daniel and Kristin

Admittedly, this is a long post – but we’re covering about 6 ½ years – so bare with us 😊 We’ve shared some of the details of our journey as they were unfolding, and a lot of people know our story – or at least bits and pieces of it – but we wanted to share a little bit about our quest to become parents on a larger scale now that we have this platform to do so.  Since the day we were married we have planned on starting a family.  After almost 5 years of infertility (May 2017) we decided it was time to find out if there was something preventing this from happening.  About a month after starting that process we learned that we both have factors that make our chances of having a child biologically somewhere around 1%.  Upon receiving this news we immediately decided to explore adoption rather than fertility treatment. We met with the wife of our lead pastor, who has a lot of experience in the world of adoption, and got the advice to explore all options and listen for God to give us guidance.  Ultimately we decided to put adoption plans on hold at that time and pursue IVF (In Vitro Fertilization), but we have always intended to return back to adoption regardless of whether or not the IVF was successful.

For those who aren’t familiar with the IVF process, I’ll spare you the details, but suffice it to say it is an INTENSE course of tests, injections, follow-ups, injections, tests, lifestyle changes, injections, more tests, etc…You get the picture.  We went through one egg retrieval which resulted in eight eggs that all fertilized. Of these eight, five made it to the blastocyst stage of development (the first milestone of development beyond fertilization). We also opted to do an additional layer of genetic testing to determine which of those embryos would be viable.  Essentially they are able to retrieve 2 or 3 cells from what will become the placenta, and from that they are usually able to tell if the embryo has the correct number of chromosomes and the sex.  Of the five we started with only one was found to be chromosomally normal, and one they were not able to get enough information on from the cells they biopsied, so it could have gone either way.  In the world of IVF they call the process of implanting the fertilized embryo a Frozen Embryo Transfer (lovely, right??). We transferred the one we had the most information on first (October 2017), and were elated when 2 weeks later we found out Kristin was PREGNANT! Our dreams were coming true! We knew from the genetic testing that it was a boy, and we held a gender reveal party for our families. Unfortunately that celebration was short lived and we learned of the first miscarriage a week or two later. Given the options of having the last embryo thawed, tested, and re-frozen – which poses a risk to embryo – or just transferring it with the information we had, we chose to take a chance, knowing that there was a possibility it was not viable to begin with. It took almost a year exactly for everything to be in place to do the second transfer in October 2018.  Once again we got the news that Kristin was pregnant, but we opted to be a little more cautious in sharing the news this time around. Just after Thanksgiving we learned of the second miscarriage, at which time we decided to wait until the new year before making any decisions about what to do next. We knew we weren’t interested in going through the IVF process again, and that we were going to adopt, but we weren’t sure which route we were going to take.

After New Years (2019) we started exploring foster-to-adopt vs traditional adoption.  We also made a resolution to pray together every night for guidance, strength, patience, favor, wisdom, and peace, among other things. We met with 3 different foster agencies and 2 adoptions agencies.  Each option has it’s pros and cons, and the cost difference is astronomical. Having already put upwards of $20,000 into IVF, the idea of putting another $25-30k into an adoption is daunting. On the other hand, talk to anyone who has gone the foster route and they will tell you “be ready to have your hearts broken”.  We’ve heard that phrase from at least 3 different sources.  The truth is that we’ve already had our hearts broken along this road – twice – and at this point in our lives we’re simply not in the market for another heartbreak. Additionally, you have zero control over the process through the foster care system, and the ultimate goal is always reunification. Which is great! Really. We both have hearts for providing a safe and loving home for children whose parents are not in the position to do so.  Our work in the school system routinely involves us in these types of cases, and we believe we will someday be able to help out in this way.  But at this point we still want the experience of raising a child from birth and having the experiences that parents get when they start their family. Our hearts are still very much open to foster care and we agree that it is in our future – and prayerfully we will adopt through that avenue as well.  While we believe that all things are possible through God, we are now fully dedicated to pursuing adoption as the primary means for starting our family – and hey, if we end up pregnant during the process, we will consider our prayers answered two-fold! We are excited to have this direction and clear path, even though it is at times a very emotional and stressful process. We believe that God is in control of our family’s destiny and we are trusting Him that He will provide us the child that is meant to be ours. We believe that not only does God provide us with the things we desire, but He also places specific desires in our hearts. Our truest heart’s desire is to be parents, and we trust that our faith will be rewarded with the opportunity to raise a child and give them a loving and nurturing home where they feel our love and commitment every day of their lives.