The Creger Family Love Story

However, we started dating, and God was in the middle of that for sure. September 11th, 2001, we watched with horror as the Twin Towers fell, and Marshall decided then and there he was going to finish his degree that year and enlist. He enlisted with the army infantry that summer and went to basic training in November and after basic training he was assigned to the 82nd Airborne. In July 19, 2003, we were married, and moving to Fort Bragg, North Carolina as man and wife at the ages of 23 and 20.

To our surprise and dismay and with no warning, Marshall was deployed within weeks to Fallujah, Iraq. This was a very intense time for us; it was the early stages of the war, and there was no consistent communication channel set up where he was going. Marshall did write letters, though. His letters were beautiful and long and descriptive. He wrote about combat in the desert and mostly about his dreams and our dreams.  He was a remarkable soldier and was on the path to do ranger school because he wanted to be an army ranger.  We also dreamed about the family we would build, children we would have, where we would live, and how we would raise our kids.

Marshall: When I came home in April, 2004 I was diagnosed with cancer. When I was diagnosed with cancer, it hit me like a ton of bricks. It was the last thing I was expecting to have to deal with at that time in my life. You have to wrap your mind around how everything is going to change and there are so many unknowns. The first chemo treatment does not cause fertility issues, so Jeanie and I never addressed it. During radiation of the initial cancer, I began to have issues in my left leg. Further scans and a biopsy revealed the cancer had spread during chemo. This meant more chemo, more radiation, and if I could be cancer free, then a stem cell transplant. After months of chemo and radiation, I was finally able to start the process for the stem cell transplant. During the transplant, the chemo dose you receive is ten times a normal chemo dose. Physically and mentally I was wiped out. I saw myself as completely different person from before. I had to deal with a multitude of health problems from then on out.

Jeanie: We were fighting an uphill battle. Marshall’s cancer went from 2b to 4b. I had held it together for 6 months pretty well running on the sincere belief that it would go as I planned, that one day God would answer our prayer and remove the tumor. You do the right things, you have the right amount of faith and good things happen, and God answers whatever prayer you may have, right?  I watched the man I married disappear before my eyes over the months of treatments. He was withdrawn and angry and I was at a loss for how to help him. But the thought of picking up where we left off once the treatments were over kept me going.  I held on to an “after cancer” reality and sincerely believed we would have the chance to be newlyweds once he was better. When things were at their worst, I would read the letters Marshall had set me from Iraq.

People prepare you for war or they prepare you for cancer, but they don’t prepare you for what happens after.  It was at this point I hit my rock bottom and had an experience with my Jesus that would change everything for me.  I hated myself, and I hated what I had become. I was so far from the little girl I used to be that would talk with God. Something kept me going to church. I think I wanted the other people to rub their goodness off on me. One day I heard a message that I must have heard a thousand times, but it was like I had heard this for the first time. I sat surrounded by strangers on the edge of my seat hearing about what Jesus did on the cross and why.

Little by little things started to change.  God was making me brand new and planting desires in my heart that were straight from Him.  It was like he was performing open heart surgery on me and I was more than willing to allow it, even when it was painful. In 2014 I was baptized which was the start of my crazy obsession with Jesus and the Bible and I just couldn’t get enough and it seemed effortless.  It was from the joy and gratitude of my heart that I wanted to do good things and figure out what His will is and do it!

Marshall: Our marriage was quite rocky because of everything we went through. I needed to work on our marriage and put Jeanie first.  This leads to today. It is so easy to focus on your needs and what you want. It is how humans are wired. You go through traumatic events in life and you justify in your head why you do certain things. It becomes a bad cycle. Life is so much better when you put others needs before yourself, extending grace and humility. When the day finally comes that you pass away,  you cannot take anything with you. What you leave is the people who loved you.

Jeanie: At this point found out we could in fact have biological children through IVF, but I wasn’t overjoyed about that fact because deep down I knew that wasn’t what God had for our story. The epiphany moment for me was during my Jesus time in the morning when I asked God what else I needed to give Him, and how could I follow Him. I felt very clearly that God asked if I trusted Him. I said yes, and realized it was time for me to give up Sarah (Sarah is what I called my miracle baby that Marshall and I would miraculously conceive one day) and so with my head bowed and tears streaming I gave Him the last thing I was clinging to – my baby that I dreamed of. I heard myself saying,“I trust you, Your will not mine, I love You I would rather go to my grave with no babies than to spend one single moment without You.” And then I let myself grieve a dream that may never be a reality.

Unfortunately at this point as a couple we still weren’t ready for adoption and our agency saw that as well. While praying inside of my closet I looked down in the corner where I had hung prayers that only I would see, and there it was: ”please heal our marriage completely, please bridge the gap, help us to communicate better, restore us once and for all.” I had taken all the verses I could find on marriage and restoration and taped them to the bottom corner of my closet. I had a tiny mustard seed of faith that our marriage would be restored.  So, off to counseling we went. In October we were cleared by our counselor to start our home study and in December we were told we had passed our home study. PRAISE JESUS!

As our story played out and we had the choice of IVF or adoption laid before us I couldn’t help but remember the little girl I was that assumed she would adopt. I wondered if God was perhaps preparing me all those years ago for what He had in mind.

Marshall: For us, it was either going to be IVF or adoption. I favored having our own kids, but there was something else tugging at my heart. I am not sure what really made me come around to the idea of adoption, but it is now within my heart and I am passionate about adoption. I am glad we are choosing the adoption route. It is not a route for just anyone, and I am so honored to be part of this adoption journey and join the many people involved that make such a miraculous thing happen.

Adoption is an amazing thing. There is so much negative societal pressure against women who choose to make an adoption plan. We are a society that believes in freedom of speech, diversity and freedom to do what you choose, but if people’s values are not in the mainstream culture then they are looked down upon. Adoption is a difficult process for a multitude of reasons. There is grief and loss for both the birth parents and the child. Adoption is a life-long process, and as future adoptive parents we will have our work set out for us to not only raise our child, but to also care for the needs that come with adoption.

We would be so honored if you joined the next step in our adoption process, through prayer and financial support.